My Mom Has/Had Breast Cancer

I guess I have done a bad job telling people mostly because I didn't know that it was my story to tell, but my Mom seems to be pretty open about it so I thought I'd write a little bit about it here.  Back in April my Mom's mammogram came back with an abnormal spot they wanted to biopsy.  Biopsy came back positive for invasive ductal carcinoma.  She came out to help me with my knee surgery at the beginning of May and then flew home to have a lumptectomy of her tumor.  They actually found two separate tumors which they were able to remove and her lymph node biopsy was clear, so they were able to proceed with intraoperative radiation.  Her tumor was sent to California for gene testing.  We thought that was the end of it for her, but then as a big shock to her and all of us they gene testing came back saying that her tumor had grade 3 dysplasia and her tumor type had a high incidence of recurrence about 25%.  They recommended she go through 4 rounds of chemotherapy spaced 3 weeks apart to reduce recurrence to more like 5%.  I have to admit that thus, far nothing had worried me too much and even this news didn't worry me, but I got off the phone when Mom told me the news and just cried because I felt so terrible for the shock she had experienced and also so bad that she would have to go through chemotherapy which is generally no fun and awful.  And it just killed me that she would be doing it all in Chicago so far away from me.

Honestly, she has done quite well.  She spent a few days after the first round in the hospital with a neutropenic fever.  She has of course lost all her hair, but has had some fun with wigs to remedy that problem.  She says her mouth tastes a bit like metal, but uses it as a tool to help with weight loss.  After all the steroids she has to take prior to each chemo round she has trouble sleeping, and once those wear off she is a little tired, but otherwise has really tolerated chemo quite well.   I decided I would for sure go out and help my Mom through her last round when she told me she would need to do chemotherapy.  She's done so well with the therapy she probably didn't need my help, but George took care of the first, Kylie the second, Nathan and Benazir the 3rd and now I'm here for the 4th.  She says having everyone come out has made this the best most fun summer ever (and that's the summer she had chemotherapy), so if the real purpose of my visit was nothing more than to boost spirits I'll consider it a success.

This lady is nuts.  I can't believe all the stuff she has been doing while I have been here.  We've gone on walks, bike rides, had a mani/pedi, visited friends, threw a birthday dinner party for Alex, went to the foot smile spa for massages, saw a movie, made two trips down town for doctors appointments, made 3 trips to Midway airpot.  And she never goes to bed until the after the Tonight show and Late Night (I tried my best to stay up with her, but usually started dozing on the couch by that time of evening).

I got in Wednesday night and Mom's friend Kitty happened to be visiting.  We all got to eat Despo's pastichio (a delicious Greek spin on lasagna) for dinner.  Then Mom, let me and Kitty try on all of her wigs.

The short hair wigs had me seriously considering cutting my hair.

Thursday was chemo day.  The last couple times my Mom has gone she had had this scary allergic reaction to one of the chemo agents.  Luckily, with a lot of prayers from me the night before and a couple drug tweaks she didn't experience that this go.

 On the way home she took me to see the township building where she serves and I got a tour of the adjoining food pantry.  And then we came home to, homemade pita from Despo.  So good!  Then, I quickly changed and caught a quick session at the Chicago temple.  There were literally only 3 women and 2 men in the session with me.  Not sure I have ever been in such an small session before.  But it was such an neat experience where the spirit strongly comforted me and confirmed to me the power of the priesthood to seal family members past and future together for eternity.   Then, I raced home to change again and jump in the car to pick Kylie up from the Midway airport.  That night Ky and I shared a bed together down in Mom's basement which we haven't done since we were kids.  Kinda fun.

The next day, Mom and I went on a 3 mile walk and my knee surprisingly did really well which made me seriously consider trying it out on a short run.  Then, we went to lunch one day at this healthy place called the left coast.  Ky was meeting a date and Mom and I showed up a short bit after her and watched their date from a corner.  Kinda a silly thing to watch your sister on a date.  Her date had no clue and Ky was just trying to keep a straight face with us gawking at them.

 On the way home Mom took me for a mani pedi.  Then, we gathered supplies to make this disgusting Dr. Fuhrman's cancer soup.  Mom had been wanting to make it, but the task seemed daunting to her.  I didn't mind making it, but I'm glad to not have to eat it.

Saturday, Mom and I biked to Despo's and she let me watch her finish making a Czech apricot cake.  That evening, we had a little birthday dinner for Alex with Despo and George.  Despo also brought these amazing Czech spiral creme puffs.


 Oh man, I wish I could hire that lady on as my person chef sometimes.  After dinner, Mom introduced me to the the foot smile spa just walking distance from her house.  It's a little Asian massage place.  You lay on actual massage chairs, but the massage is done fully clothed and seemed to really focus on foot massage.  It was a relaxing way to end the day and reminded me a lot of our Thai massage in Barbados.

Sunday morning, Mom and I caught sacrament meeting at her ward building.  Then, we went home where George prepared a Czech breakfast for us and Aunt Julie and Stephanie who happened to be in town that weekend too.  Czech breakfast consisted of sliced peppers, tomatoes, and cucumbers along with some deli meats, sliced crusty bread, soft cheeses, and pate (if you are in to that kind of thing).  Then, Julie, Stephanie, Mom and I walked the Northwestern Island before Julie and Stephanie dropped Mom and I downtown for a little shopping.

 We went to the Disney Store to get a few things for Liv's birthday and Fox's (it's like outlet designer clothing--I love that place and there is nothing like it in Utah) happened to be across the street so I ducked in there too.  Then, we met Ky at a Russia tea house for afternoon tea, and headed to Midway airport to send Ky off.

  After we had dropped Ky, Mom and I had just gotten back downtown when Kylie called asking us to come back and get her because she had given up her seat for a $550 travel voucher!  So, it was back to Midway airport...again.  Ky and I bunked together again and stayed up way too late pillow talking especially since we had to get up early to drive her yet again to Midway airport.

Of course there was tons of traffic, but we got Ky to the airport in plenty of time to catch her flight.  After all these trips to Midway, I finally understand why Mom hates it so much when we fly into that airport.  I will repent and try to fly into O'Hare from here on out.  Mom had a free massage at this neat cancer center with free services for local cancer patients.  After that Mom and I went to this fabulous Greek restaurant for lunch.  Then, we made George pot roast for dinner as he was feeling depraved of real food.

Then, Mom and I went walking in Golf-tons of unique ginormous homes.  And then ended the evening visiting with Mom's friend Linda who lives in the area.

Tuesday morning, Mom had a follow-up visit with her radiation doctor who gave her the good news that she was fine to withhold doing any further radiation, so at this point she is mostly done with treatment except for her estrogen suppressant that she has to take for the next 5 years.  Yay!  Then, we headed back to Mom's house where I cleaned her bathrooms and vacuumed, but couldn't motivate myself to mop too.  Then, we saw Sully in the movie theatres in Glenview.  It was good, but maybe not the best movie to see right before catching a flight back home.  On the way home, we stopped and walked the 1.5 mile loop around the lake, then it was off to Midway airport one last time and back to home for me.

My kids and especially husband missed much, but did survive a week without me thanks to the helps of numerous friends and family.  It's been crazy trying to get out house back in order, and Derek tells me 5 times a day how good it is to have me home.  But overall, it was a fabulous kid free trip to spend a little one on one with the madre.