The Ongoing Battle

As I am frequently reminded (as if I didn't already know), Derek and I STILL do not have kids. However, we have this on going battle of how we are going to raise our kids.

First, there is the argument of whether we should have girls or boys (as if we really have a say in this). I personally think it would be nice to have a mixture of both, but that would be a compromise you see, and then it would end the fight which, as Derek would tell you, is not my stubborn self's way of fighting. And, Derek of course, is currently spending loads of money on graduate school to learn how to be a professional arguer, so he does not settle for compromises either. Anyways, he seems to think that we are going to have all boys. I on the othe hand, love to tell him that I'm certain we are going to have 5 girls. The best part is watching him squirm as he pictures a house with himself surrounded by 6 other women, boxes and boxes of tampons, and all of us chatting up a storm and PMSing at the same time! For those of you who know my husband, you can chuckle along with me at this very funny sight, and can thus, understand why I love to argue that we should indeed have 5 girls. There is just no other way to have it right?

Second is the argument of late, whether to raise our children as Utards (as I refer to them) or Nevada Hos (as he refers to them). Personally, I would rather we raise our children as something more distinguished like Bostonians or heck, to be realistic, how about Oregonians? Did you know that Nevada has the eighth-highest incidence of drug abuse in the United States. Classy huh? Luckily, we recently moved from the highest teenage pregancy rates in the nation to the 12th highest bravo! But once again, I'm stubborn and he has put us into debt learning how to win arguments for a profession, so we must find uncommon ground to fight over. I like to point out all the great things about Nevada like how our kids will grow up in a town that is not 90% LDS, learn to better co-exist with those not of their faith, really be forced to gain a testimony for themselves, and learn that people who smoke and drink are not bad people, they just have bad habits. He likes to point out that well, like it or not, I married a Utard myself, who turned out just fine (or else why did I marry him...hmmm he has me there), and many a great people have been raised in the wonderful state of Utah who are able to co-exist outside an enviroment where you can walk up to any grocery store clerk, ask them what they thought of the conference talks last weekend, and honestly expect an answer.

Last (and I must impress upon you the seriousness of this, the most important of our quibbles), is the dilemma of whether our children should be cross-country runners or football players. Many a fight have been had over this one. You see, cross-country and football are during the same athletic season. So naturally, our children must choose. I vow to have very skinny, scrawny, children who's body type will leave them with no choice, but to be cross-country runners. Derek then in turn, argues that he will take the kids between meals to McDonalds, Burger King, Wendy's...you name it to fatten them up so they can be heavy, hearty, football players. So, I then retort that I will take them on 10 mile runs every day to keep them skinny and show them the joy of running to throw things back on my side of the court. Anyways, this goes on and on in circles. But honestly, what parent really wants their child to play a sport where the object is to get the man not the ball? What other sport is there like this? So focused on tackling, injuring, and fattening your players?

In short, I guess only time will tell who wins these arguments. But, I really hope it's me!